I don’t know how to write this.
My muse is at a loss.
She’s used to painting things much heavier
and darker, with backdrops a black splash of storm
or grey with murky depths.
And this,
calling for light and air and cloudless skies -
I can’t use her for this;
this is completely outside her palette.
A small part of me will mourn
as she gathers dust in a corner,
motes sparkling in the sunlight
she cannot translate.
But most of me will be out basking,
spinning circles in the grass,
not wishing it any other way.

Misspent Youth

By Peter F. Hamilton

The book jacket description led  me to believe this would be my kind of science fiction -  the kind that uses the sci-fi element to explore human psychology and sociology, rather than just being an adventure story set in space or the future (though those can be enjoyable too). And it could have done that, if it hadn’t gotten sidetracked by male hormones. Apparently the author feels that the only thing a man suddenly made young again will want to do is have sex with as many women and girls as possible. Admittedly, this could be true in many cases (though I like to think that while wanting lots of sex may be universal, some men would at least be monogamous in such a situation). The patchwork attempt to lend the story some larger overarching purpose or message via the European Union/Brussels/independence protests storyline seems more like an afterthought, a thin attempt to put a more sophisticated veneer on what is basically a catalog of sexual conquests by the protaganist. Maybe I dislike this book so much because it has more realism regarding humanity’s darker tendencies (lying, cheating, gratuitous/meaningless sex, violence), but I’ve read plenty of books with those elements before that I still enjoyed. The difference is that they at least had some redeeming factor, usually in the form of a protaganist I could actually like or relate to. Overall, this was a disappointing read – I kept waiting for the payoff that would make reading it worthwhile, but it never came.

I give it 1/5 stars.

Wow, so it’s been awhile since I’ve written on here. Note to self: must do better about updating blog. Part of the problem is that the Font o’ Ideas where my writing springs from has been alarming low of late, and I’m not sure how to go about remedying it. Obviously, waiting around for the muse to return on her own is not working, so I’m going to try a more proactive approach. I’m getting a couple of books from the library all about writing and creativity and writing exercises, and am going to try those out, see if it helps.

On the other hand, I have been creative in non-writing form. For my most awesome boyfriend, I made this nifty wood carving for Vday. He had been saying he needs art for his walls; voila, I provide.

If you’ve checked in on my official NaNoWriMo page at all, you know that I am FAR behind on my quota of 50,000 words by the end of this month. In my defense, I do have a great deal of the entire novel (which will likely be more than 50,000 words) outlined, I just haven’t actually written it out yet. This is due to several factors, summarized below.

I have determined that it is practically impossible to keep up with NaNoWriMo when:

1. You run your own small business and holiday season (aka. The Gauntlet) is starting.
2. You lose a week and a half by being out sick and then having to catch up on real work before you can devote time to writing.
3. Said real work leaves you stressed out and exhausted, and all you want to do with your limited free time is relax with good books or your boyfriend, instead of writing a novel about a topic that stresses you out and is occasionally sad.

The last point is admittedly the most controllable, as I could’ve just picked a different topic to write about. But writing a book is hard work no matter the topic or angle, and sometimes my day job just doesn’t leave me with the energy to tackle that.

I may do my own version of NaNoWriMo in a less hectic time of the year – perhaps May (MayNoWriMo?). Regardless, I do plan to keep plugging away at this novel in small chunks until then, and ultimately completing it, as it’s a story that I feel is important to see told.

The Magicians

by Lev Grossman

I wasn’t bored by this book, for sure, but ultimately I wasn’t satisfied either. The cynical, disinterested view of the narrator, Quentin, pervades even the alternate magical world(s) he becomes privy to. There is a bit of wonder and awe at this new fantastic dimension to everyday life, but moreso there’s a grungy, apathetic feel to the whole book, that I was hoping would be resolved by the end and wasn’t. I don’t have a problem with drinking and sex on principle, or even drugs for the purposes of fiction, but they were present to such a degree that I got sick of it and of the characters engaging in such wasteful excess when, c’mon, they have magic to explore and be excited about! I felt more disgust and impatience with them to get over themselves and get on with life, than I did empathy for them.

I especially wanted to like Quentin, and at times did, but the usual story payoff of an antihero narrator changing/growing didn’t happen – he ends much like he began and behaved the entire book. He also ends much stronger in magical skill, which is something, but not stronger in any other area. Certainly not any stronger in regards to principles or personality. The most likable character, Alice, who may have had some chance of redeeming Quentin – well, I don’t want to give away any spoilers, but let’s just say that doesn’t happen and I was not happy with the direction her storyline ultimately took. The world Quentin falls in love with from childhood books, Fillory, comes off as a hollow mockery of established fantasy worlds like Narnia, which may have been intentional, but didn’t go over well with me.

Overall, I really was interested in the plot and the characters and the world of magic that Grossman portrayed, but a large part of my interest was in the hopes that they would prove worthy of devoting that much reading time to, and ultimately they didn’t. I closed the book with a memorably unsatisfied ‘hmph.’ If the intention was to parallel real world dissatisfaction and angst and ennui in magical fiction, it worked. But that’s not what I want or like to read – I am admittedly an escapist reader, and I want my reading ventures to be either pleasant or satisfying or both, and this was neither.

I will say, though, that the quality of the writing itself (voice, grammar, style, etc.) was very good. That alone isn’t enough to make me want to reread this book, or read any other of Grossman’s works, however.

I give it 2/5 stars.

A review over at Amazon says it really well:

“Definitely, the book had the makings of a great story. Yet, I was left numb at the end, not happy, not sad, not scared. And that, really, is why I left this review with 3 stars. I read fiction to be entertained. This entertainment can be in the form of humor, feeling good, scared, excited, titillated, insightful, or some combination thereof. Instead, when I read this book, I saw through the eyes of a fairly apathetic protagonist, who messes things up and blames everyone else, who had chances to become a hero and fails each time. I read about a person who wanted something, got it, didn’t like it, and became apathetic. I read about the antagonist being defeated, the protagonist winning in the end, and no one feeling … well, happy for having accomplished anything. Perhaps this is what real life can be. But come on, that’s not entertainment. And that’s what’s sad about this, that this book had the potential to be a GREAT story, but misses the mark significantly.” – Mitchell M. Tse

Elfland

by Freda Warrington

Overall, I thought this was an interesting way to mix the world of fantasy with the modern world. The lines between what makes a being human or a fairy are blurry and blurrable (at least from the fairy side). An Aetherial being (as they are called in the book) can blend in with humans no problem – their true selves only show in other realms or to other Aetherials. They can also choose to reject their otherworldly side and forget about their race’s history and powers, and become essentially human – as a few characters in the book attempt to do. The way Aetherials can slip ’sideways’ between different realms/dimensions – intentionally or accidentally – was a bit of a new twist, too. No stone circles or travelling west into twilight necessary. And I like a good romance storyline with occasional sex scenes as well as the next woman, so a few bonus points for that.

My major beef with this book, though, is unfortunately it’s largest action-driven plot point – Lawrence Wilder and the mysterious threat from beyond the Gates. Even by the end, it is not really clearly explained why, if the threat has always been there from the beginning of creation, it is only awakening now. There’s some vague mention about Lawrence’s nightmares having had something to do with it, possibly creating it, but that doesn’t jive with the story that it was always there. But the more character-driven side of the ending (namely, Rose’s storyline) was very satisfactory, so I found myself able to overlook the bit about Lawrence and still have the warm fuzzy feeling that comes from finishing a good book.

I give it 3.5/5 stars.

My birthday was this past weekend (the 23rd, for those of exacting curiosity) and my geeky bookworm side was indulged to the max. Witness below:

On the left, you see 3 books that I purchased just today from Austin’s wonderful BookPeople store with a gift card from my friend Nicholas. I picked a good mix: a modern sci-fi, an epic fantasy, and of course a book all about dragons. I’m eager to dive into them, but my reading attention is currently taken up by the other half of the picture above.

On the afternoon of my birthday, the doorbell rang, a box was delivered, I near broke my back picking it up expecting something lighter, and then I open it. The ENTIRE Sword of Truth series by Terry Goodkind. Sent by none other than my awesome boyfriend, who gets bonus points for being clever and absolutely surprising me. See, I’d first stumbled on this series when I chanced to watch an episode of Legend of the Seeker and got hooked. I found out it was based on this series, which I’d been meaning to read for awhile anyway. I got the first one from the library, thoroughly enjoyed it, and requested the 2nd one, which was checked out but they could put on hold for me when it came back in. And then I waited. And waited, and waited. Longest library hold EVER. I commiserated with my boyfriend on the long wait more than once (he, too, is a fan of the series), and he decided to end my wait and make me squeal girlishly in birthday book excitement all in one fell swoop.

I’m halfway through book 2, Stone of Tears – witness the crease down the spine – and the bookworm inside me is rubbing its hands together maniacally in anticipation of tackling the rest of this haul.